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5th December 2022

Jokes about political mishaps, 80's pop comebacks and award show dramas voted funniest in annual festive gag competition Featuring Kate Bush, Will Smith and Chris Rock, Liz Truss and King Charles III

  • TV channel Gold challenged the nation to come up with the best topical Christmas cracker jokes for the tenth year running
  • The winning festive joke for 2022: "What type of peas ruin Christmas Dinner? MPs"
  • Topics including rising energy costs, queue-jumping and brawling actors got the festive funny treatment this year

A festive joke about politicians ruining Christmas dinners has been revealed as the winner of a Gold's annual competition to create the best topical Christmas cracker gags, according to the British public.

Other topical stories from the past 12 months have been used as material for the top festive funnies, including Holly and Phil's infamous queue-jumping, the rising cost of living and Will Smith's slap at the Oscars.

The winning jokes are revealed by UKTV channel Gold's annual festive competition for new Christmas cracker jokes which aims to keep the country chuckling this festive period, adding a comical spin to a rollercoaster year. Now in its tenth year, the competition once again challenged entrants to come up with the best topical and modern Christmas cracker jokes, which were then voted for by the British public to determine the winners.

Gold's top 10 funniest new Christmas cracker jokes for 2022 are revealed as:

  1. What type of peas ruin Christmas Dinner? MPs
  2. Why does Kate Bush need to turn the heating off? She's running up that bill.
  3. How did King Charles III sign his Christmas cards to his family? The Artist Formerly Known As Prince
  4. What's the difference between Liz Truss and a shepherd? One U-turns and the other turns ewes
  5. Why are Will Smith and Chris Rock not having turkey this Christmas? Because they've got beef
  6. Why has Santa been banned from sooty chimneys? Carbon footprints
  7. What crisps do Phil and Holly serve at their Christmas party? Skips.
  8. Why are the Government having problems with their own version of the Christmas Nativity? They can't find three wise men
  9. What do people heating their homes and wrapping paper have in common this Christmas? Both of them are getting ripped off
  10. How can you keep your home warm this Christmas? Tinsulation

Gold challenged the British public to tweet original festive gags to enter the competition. Entries were shortlisted by a panel of judges - led by comedy critic Bruce Dessau - and put to an anonymous public vote of 2,000 British adults to reveal the winning jokes. The top six jokes are included within bespoke boxes of Gold's Christmas crackers, which were presented to this year's winners.

The annual joke competition celebrates Gold's seasonal TV scheduling, which includes classic festive episodes of Britain's best loved comedies such as Gavin & Stacey, Only Fools and Horses, The Vicar of Dibley and Keeping Up Appearances.

Comedy critic Bruce Dessau, who led the Gold judging panel, says,

After another year of ups and downs the British public has delivered the laughs, with this year's modern Christmas cracker jokes covering topics from the rising cost of living to queue-jumping presenters and politicians performing U-turns. Proving that once again we're a nation with an unrelenting sense of humour!

Gerald Casey, Gold channel director, says,

This year's Gold Christmas cracker joke competition has provided a wealth of imaginative and hilarious contributions from the great British public, putting a festive funny spin on the events of 2022. For 30 years now Gold has been putting a smile on the nation's faces and our viewers know they can rely on our Christmas programming to end the year with a laugh.

The author of the winning joke, Claire Travers Smith from London, received the top prize of £1,500 towards a holiday, a festive hamper and a box of bespoke Gold Christmas Crackers, one of which will contain her own winning gag.

All the jokes voted on by the British public are original content to the best of Gold's knowledge.


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About Gold

Sky 110(HD)/ 810, Virgin 124, NOW/ BT Ent 343/358, TalkTalk 310 On demand on Sky, Virgin Media & NOW

Dedicated to celebrating the best of British comedy, Gold is the nation's favourite comedy channel. Classic British comedy series loved by all the family sit comfortably alongside new UKTV Original scripted comedies crafted by some of the nation's finest comedic minds, such as?Dad's Army: The Lost Episodes, Murder, They Hope, The Cockfields?and ?Sandylands. Meanwhile Gold's unscripted series reunite the stars and partnerships of the nation's best-loved shows to get to the heart of what makes them so evergreen - from passion projects such as?French & Saunders: Funny Women, Billy Connolly Does..., Lenny Henry's Race Through Comedy?and Ricky and Ralf's Very Northern Road Trip?to the retrospective likes of?dinnerladies diaries?and_?The Fast Show: Just A Load of Blooming Catchphrases._

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UKTV has been at the forefront of branded television for over 30 years, entertaining the nation with programmes they love. Its leading brands - Dave, Gold, W, Drama, Alibi, Eden and Yesterday - span comedy, entertainment, natural history, factual and drama, and are delivered to audiences through UKTV Play, Freeview, Sky, Virgin Media, BT, TalkTalk, YouView, Freesat and Amazon Fire. The broadcaster is a significant investor in British creativity and is committed to working with new and established writers, directors and programme-makers.

UKTV is part of BBC Studios, the UK's most-awarded production company, a world-class distributor with international branded services, and a commercial subsidiary of the world's leading public service broadcaster, the BBC.